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Necessary Endings

I started reading Necessary Endings by Dr. Henry Cloud a couple months ago. I purchased the book after realizing I was stuck and if I was going to get unstuck I would need to end some things in order to start other things.
Now, of all the things I thought I was going to need to end, Phreedum was so not on the list. There were relationships, personal and professional, self defeating thoughts and behaviors, that I thought would need to end or drastically change. However, as I read the book (which I highly recommend), looked at where I was in life, and where I wanted to go, I realized that Phreedum as it has been needed to end. Phreedum was not part of the future I knew I wanted and deserved.
And so a few weeks back I made the initial announcemet that Phreedum would be no more effective January 1st, 2013.
As I spent the other evening getting things in order for taxes next year, figuring out what to do with left over inventory, and talking with a few friends who wanted to "make sure" I was sure about discontinuing Phreedum, I cried..
Part of the tears were the ones that come with endings that are difficult. Trust me if you think starting a business is difficult, try making the decision and going through the process of closing one. You wrestle with if you tried enough, if you should try harder, if it was a stupid idea and no one in your life was brave enough to tell you that from the start, or if you're a failure.
But, there were also some happy tears. I had made a decision that was certainly not an easy decision, but one that has phreed me to be more curious, excited, and ready for my future.  I phreed myself to go after the other longings of my heart, like relocating either to the west coast or over seas. I phreed myself to go back to writing more regularly and for various populations through agreeing to write for Bauce magazine. I phreed myself to work on a book. I have always wanted to write a book. When I was in the mentally gifted program in elementary school (nerd alert) my final projects for the year was always in the form of a book I wrote and illustrated. Ending Phreedum has phreed me to begin a new kind of personal freedom, and I am ridiculously antsy with anticipation about all that my new freedom holds.
Endings are necessary, and perhaps that is because without them we don't get the luxury of a life fully begun.

It has been an amazing year readers. Between the incredible entrepreneurs I got to meet and interview, the collaborations with different shops including Kembrel, providing free workshops for women in the community, and blogging, 2012 has been truly an incredible year. And for that, I thank you.

It s my hope that as 2013 you give yourself permission for the things that need ending to end. No matter how tough, uncomfortable, crazy, or scary it seems, my hope is that you let it go. And then, my hope is that you allow yourself to embrace what your future holds. Whether it's going to school for the first time or the third time, asking him or her out after a friendship of several years and being convinced that you could be more than friends (but not friends with benefits, ain't nobody got time for that), taking the necessary steps to buy your first home, taking the necessary steps for your first vacation overseas, taking the necessary steps to become financially independent, forgiving people in your past so you can be emotionally invested in your present relationships, choosing a new career, etc. There is no time like the present to end what needs ending and begin what needs beginning.

What we call the beginning is often the end. And to make an end is to make a beginning. The end is where we start from.
-T.S. Elliot



Happy New Year! xxoo

Moving Forward


The year is winding down and I don't know about you, but I am super looking forward to what the new year will bring. And I'm not rushing these next couple of days along, I am taking them in, enjoying the time away from the 9-5, visiting with family and friends. However, there is something to be said for being the promise of the new year. As the year winds down may you take in these last few days for what they are. May you revel in them, soak up the remaining days making the best of 2012, may you spend time looking toward your best moments of 2012, but not for very long. 2013 is a coming with new opportunities, and like I said, I am super excited about what the new year will bring.  So this Thursday I am sending some of my excitement your way!

Happy Thursday! xxoo

Contentment... Don't Underestimate It

"I have learned whatever state I am in, whether in much or in want, to be content."
 - Paul

If 2012 has taught me nothing else, it is to be enough. And I think it is when one learns they are and have enough that they can be content. Never complacent, but content, whatever the circumstance.
May you be content today. Whether with much or little, whether you are embarking on much or trying to wrap up little, may you be content and may it be well with your soul. 

Happy Thursday xxoo

The Gifts You've Been Given

Many of us will spend more money in the next few weeks than we have all year long (save the vacation to Cancun, the 21st, 25th, 30th, or 50th birthday party, the new home, or car). We will spend in the name of gifts. We will buy gifts for parents, siblings, significant others, bosses (horrible or not), our besties, our boos,  mail carriers, and our dog walkers. We will give and give and give.And...I think gift giving us great. But, it makes me wonder, what are you doing with the gifts you have been given?

Now, I'm not talking about the Diesel watch, the iphone5, the cashmere sweater, the Juicey Couture wallet, CoCo Chanel bag, the 46 inch flat screen, or the crisp Benjamins in the card from Aunt Hazel. I'm talking about the gifts you have been given such as leadership, organization, photography, entrepreneurship, make up artistry, writing, designing, baking, cooking, storytelling, networking, acting, etc.- all of those gifts that won't be wrapped under any tree or exchanged at any party.




What are you doing with what you have been given to do ever since you came on the scene of life?

While Christmas is close, the new year is just as close, and I am wondering what exactly do you plan to do with all of your talents and abilities?  What job will you quit in order to start the one that allows you to utilize your supervisory skills and passion for youth? Whose small business development class will you sign up for entrepreneur? How many people will you organize for an MLK day of service project leader? What mural will you paint for MLK day artist? Whose stage will you take and remind couples why they fell in love on Valentine's day? How much extra money will you save in your newly opened ING account for your own make up studio? dance studio? pastry shop and cafe?

As I wrap up 2012 and look forward to 2013 I keep in mind that which I know I am gifted to be and do. I have been seeking opportunities to do those things which incorporate my gifts and disengaging from those things which don't. My hope is that in the coming days you will take a moment to do the same. As you have been so graciously gifted with your various and unique talents, skills, and abilities, may you go and use them well, wisely, and with others. 



"We are each gifted in a unique and important way. It is our privilege and our adventure to discover our own special light."- Mary Dunbar
Happy Tuesday! xxoo



A Better Mistake




“Nothing in the world can take the place of perseverance. 

Talent will not; nothing is more common than unsuccessful people with talent. 
Genius will not; unrewarded genius is almost legendary. 
Education will not; the world is full of educated derelicts. 
Perseverance and determination alone are omnipotent.”- Calvin Coolidge


It's not about perseverance to complete a task or reach a goal. It's about the commitment and perseverance it takes to never quit on being your best. It's about not becoming dissuaded by mistakes or setbacks but sticking it out, running every lap,  and leaping over every hurdle.

Twenty seven days and counting until Phreedum- products, events, and blog takes an indefinite pause. Thousands of days and counting as I continue to be all that I was created to be a little over 10310 days ago. 

Happy Tuesday! xxoo 






You are what you love



 If what you love isn't evident in the way you live, you got some changing to do.
And, there's no time like the present.
Happy Thursday! xxoo